I Smiled

I smiled. And always will be smiling or not, laughing. Non-stop. But I don't care that people think that i am crazy for laughing or just simply being amused at things or speech that might sound lame and not funny to others, but it is too me.

People including my family members always assumed that i had no worries at all cause I always laugh things off. When i fall down, i laugh at myself for being silly and tripped over. When i failed my exams, i laugh about it and say that God gave me a slow brain, what to do?. When people around me scold and framed me for no reason, i just shut up and still laugh it off hoping for things to get better. Truth is, when i fall, i feel pain but i still laugh cause i don't want others to be pitiful towards me cause i am not pitiful. When i failed exams, I am so sad, sad beyond words so i laugh it off trying to fool myself wishing that it is all going to be alright.When i get misunderstood for things that i don't even know what happened, you all will never know the feeling of my heart that is crushed beneath all the heavy burdensome lies that people talk about me.

I had live my 19 years of life smiling and laughing in no matter what situation, hoping for a better turn out but people just don't appreciate.
The always smiling me doesn't mean that i got no worries. The always smiling me doesn't mean that i got no thoughts of my own. The always smiling me is just to hide the inner true me.
Sigh~ So i will just SMILED. no more SMILE.